Some might call it crisis. I think I might have done that to. But to stay prosperous and cheerful I choose this more forward looking terminology. I thought I had mine 40-year crisis some years ago. And therefore convinced that this would mean I wouldn’t get one closing in on 40…
All of a sudden I started to question everything but my family. Job, “career” choice, where we live etc etc. Fundamental things for feeling good about myself. A good friend helped me out with the fact that our trip to the US had been a central thing of my mind since we decided on it early last year. naturally after all the planning and hush hush of our wedding plans and the actual making of it life in Skottorp fell a bit flat after returning.
But still. I am doing exactly what I want with my life? If not, what is stopping me? The truth is most probably the worst and the hardest – I don’t know what I want, more then something different. And to do stuff differently just because is not really for me. (I guess here it is somewhere here many think that a change of partner r a new baby, will do the trick. trust me, none of these will happen here…) I need to know where I am heading towards something. And finding this out is demanding.
On the other hand there is no alternative.